Secrets for Boosting Confidence
Listen to Secrets for Boosting Confidence
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Hey there and welcome. Are you a woman who is unapologetically ambitious, but you're also deeply focused on honoring God, loving your family well and pursuing meaningful work? Well, you've come to the right place. My name is Dana Byers and you and I are going to be fast friends. Let's get started. Before we get started today, I wanna take just a moment to share with you a recent five star review, my podcast received. Jenna said, Dana is gifted by God, humble, wise, and generous. The ripple effects of her work is beautiful. She sees people not projects. Jenna, thank you for these beautiful words. If you're listening to my podcast and it has helped you, please take just a moment and leave me a five star review that's going to help give so many more people access to my podcast.
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Well, hello there everyone. Welcome back to another episode of Been There, learned that I am Dana Byers, your hostess. I am a certified life coach. I work specifically with Christian women who are in the workplace. I help them with all sorts of things like burnout, how to navigate, showing up with authentic energy when they're stressed, how to care for themselves and how to draw closer to God while they live out his calling on their lives. And today I wanna talk to you about something that I think could be really helpful, and that is four traits that Christian women can develop to increase their confidence. And I think this is very important because it's one thing to just say that we're more confident, but it's another thing to authentically experience the, the ability to increase our confidence as we draw closer to God without being prideful.
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This is completely possible and I really think it's important to talk about because I think confidence is an attribute that many of us aspire to possess, but a lot of us maybe don't truly understand it. When we talk about the qualities of a confident Christian woman, we are really diving into something that is a, a complex overlap of all sorts of things. You know, our faith, our thoughts, our behaviors, our attitudes, the experiences we've had in our past. All of those things collectively form to create your current mindset. So this episode is really aiming to help you kind of discover what goes on in the mind of a confident Christian woman, and to show you how these elements or these traits we're gonna talk about how they contribute to your overall sense of self-assurance and how that will directly impact your definition of success in your personal life and your professional and your spiritual life as well.
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You see, I believe confidence is a decision. Now, don't get me wrong here. I'm not saying you just say you're confident and all of a sudden it magically happens. But I'm saying that you can make an intentional decision to take action towards moving in the direction of being more confident today while you are developing your confidence over time. So why do I believe this? Or how do I know this? Well, this is exactly what I've been doing for years now. I've been living my life in many instances in over my head saying yes to opportunities that God has given me that often kind of have me shaking in my boots. But God has really helped me over the years, through relationships, through experience, through coaching, through counseling, to help me be able to show up fully and be able to acknowledge how I feel and be fully present, but still be able to take the risk to try the things, to develop the confidence, to build that confidence muscle.
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So it's possible that you have a strong faith in God, but you doubt yourself. That's completely possible. And if that's where you are today, that is not a problem and it's not a problem because actually the outcome of our lives is significantly dependent more on God than it is on ourselves, right? You and I wake up every day, we show up, we focus on being prayed up, reading God's word, showing up intentionally. But we can still doubt ourselves and we might even at times have doubt in God. So I don't think it's a problem that you might have a strong sense of faith, but you're doubting yourself. But I do think it could be problematic for you in the future if it isn't already a problem if you are choosing not to develop and grow your confidence. So I'm not coming at this from a place of here's what you should do.
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I don't think that is an appropriate approach to coaching As a coach, I think what's best is for me to give you some examples and invite you into consider where God might be showing you opportunities to increase your confidence. So I'm very passionate about this topic of confidence. I've personally had the joy and the reward of walking through helping many women increase their confidence quickly and authentically. In fact, I believe you could become more confident in just a few hours. That's right. I created a 10 hour confidence transformation course. It's available@danabyerscoaching.com slash get coached. You can get more details there. But for right now, I want to dive into some specifics. We're gonna talk about these four traits that Christian women can develop to increase their confidence. So maybe get out a pen and a piece of paper. If you are listening to this and you're not driving listen up, I want you to be looking for at least one of these four traits.
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I want you to identify one that you can focus on developing today. Trait number one. This is the trait of embracing your imperfections, or maybe even we would call it the trait of celebrating your strengths. You see, a lot of the women I've worked with, whether they're clients of mine or peers of mine in other jobs I've worked in, they've helped me see that a confident Christian woman knows that imperfections are part of being human. So instead of hiding or denying her imperfections, instead she acknowledges them openly. She is trusting, leaning into God's grace, being sufficient for her, but she's also looking for other people to support her in those areas where she might be struggling. So this level of transparency not only makes her more relatable, it it brings a sense of vulnerability, but it also frees her up from the constant pressure of appearing flawless.
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So when you and I accept our flaws as confident Christian women, it helps us also take time to celebrate the strengths that we do have. God has given us spiritual gifts. You read about that in scripture. We can identify what we bring to the table and we don't have to be afraid to utilize those strengths to utilize or employ those gifts that God has given us. So this view, you know, embracing the imperfections and celebrating our strengths, this view helps us maintain healthy self-image. So the ego isn't in the picture too much, but it also helps us honor God and the gifts that he's given us so that we can utilize those in the places where we have a sphere of influence. So one of the most fundamental qualities of a confident Christian woman is self-acceptance. She understands that she's created in God's image, but she also embraces her flaws as much as her strengths.
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So this acceptance allows you to navigate life without the burden of unrealistic expectations or self-criticism, knowing, believing, trusting, having faith that you are loved and valued by our creator God himself. So the second trait I wanna look at in this episode is the trait of resilience or maybe persistence. Resilience is another key quality that defines the mindset of a confident Christian woman. Life throws curve balls at all of us, right? But it's really how we handle these challenges that can set us apart as confident women. And you see, persistence is really closely tied to resilience, right? Sometimes we use those words interchangeably. You see a confident Christian woman who is authentically confident, who's dependent on God. She doesn't give up easily. She keeps moving forward appropriately, despite obstacles without burning herself out. You and I can rely on our faith and our connection to the Holy Spirit to guide us.
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We can be persistent because of tapping into the supernatural strength that God makes available to us. So our determination ensures that temporary setbacks do not have to derail our long term goals. Now, quick side note here. I think it's important to important to point this out because I know a lot of you listening to this are high achievers. When I talk about resilience or persistence, this is not an encouragement or even permission for you to run yourself ragged resilience doesn't mean you don't rest. Okay? So just a little side note there. I think it's important for you to hear from me. And you know, when we think about resilience or persistence, it's important to keep this mindset of lifelong learning from our experiences. Whether they are things that we consider successes or failures. A confident Christian woman views her failures or her experiences or the the shortfalls.
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She views them as learning opportunities rather than significant setbacks. So you and I can analyze what went wrong, and we can use that knowledge, that experience to improve ourselves, trusting that God has a purpose for every trial, and this ability to turn the negatives into positives appropriately without being toxic. We know we don't wanna have toxic positivity, but the ability to take what could be negative experiences and learn from them, actually gain strength from them, that fuels our resilience and it fuels our faith and our connection to God. So we believe that lifelong learning and continuously seeking opportunities for growth through that, you know, whether we're trying to grow with a formal education or reading books, hiring a coach, attending a workshop, just learning from our experiences, we can focus on always seeking, seeking to grow personally, but also to deepen our relationship with God.
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He is in the midst of all of these things that we are experiencing in which we need to be resilient or persistent. He is there with us. We are not alone. So lifelong learning, it includes employing what you may have heard, which is called a growth mindset. So when we employ a growth mindset, that means that it's propelling us forward in all aspects of our lives, in our personal development, our career advancement, our relationships in our spiritual growth. And this is a foundational principle of my coaching business and my personal life, really. You know, it's no mistake that I named this very podcast, been there, learned that it's quite easy for me to come up with content to share with you every week because the lifelong learning from my failures and my experiences and my successes and everything in between for, you know, more than four decades now, all of those experiences are things that I'm here to share with you.
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And all I had to do is embrace the ups and downs, is to hold a little bit less tightly in fear in the rollercoaster of my life, and be able to enjoy the ride a little bit more every day, I hope. And my intent here in this podcast is to show you what's possible. I wanna show you what's possible when you embrace lifelong learning. So trait two was resilience or persistence. Let's look at trait three. This is the trait of assertiveness. Assertiveness is one of the standout qualities of a confident Christian woman. She knows how to stand up for herself to express her ideas clearly, and to really share what she believes in without being aggressive or passive. You can learn a lot more about assertiveness, which again, is not the same as aggressiveness. You can learn a lot more about that in my 10 hour confidence transformation course.
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You see, assertiveness includes clear communication and setting boundaries. A confident Christian woman understands the importance of setting boundaries in both her personal and her professional relationships. And she can do that without being rude. You can do this in a kind way. It is an art and a science that you can develop. You're gonna be able to communicate these boundaries effectively as you focus on the trait of assertiveness. You can assure that others are respecting you, but you are also honoring their values and commitments while honoring your values and commitments. And the fourth trait of confidence is empathy or maybe compassion. And the important thing here is not just having compassion for others, but also compassion for yourself. Contrary to popular belief, confidence does not equate. It is not the same as arrogance or insensitivity. You know, I'm not asking you to become a bulldozer, okay?
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In fact, I think one of the defining qualities of a confident Christian woman is her ability to empathize with others while maintaining her own sense of self worth. So you're going to learn, if you haven't already, how to take the time to understand other people's viewpoints as best as you can. This is gonna make you more approachable and likable, but it's also gonna give you a deep sense of empathy and compassion to build healthier, stronger relationships, to increase a sense of trust that is based on mutual respect. And you get to embody Christ's love for others at work and at home as you develop your capacity to show compassion to others and to yourself. And just a little opinion I wanna throw in here from my own personal experience, I did not find it easier to increase my compassion for others until I went through a season where I was intentionally focused on asking God to help me create a sense of compassion for myself in my own circumstances.
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I wasn't a victim to my circumstances, but I was able to validate at times difficulties I was walking through, which really opened me up to feel freer about those experiences, to have compassion and empathy for my myself and the circumstances I was in. And then I was able to extend that to others authentically. So we've just looked at four traits that Christian women can develop to increase their confidence. Which one of these would you like to focus on? Trait one is embracing your imperfections while celebrating your strengths. Trait two is focusing on resilience or persistence. Trait three is developing assertiveness. And trait four is increasing your empathy or compassion for others. Remember, the mindset behind confidence involves so much more than just outward appearances. It's not just how we look. It's deeply rooted within us. It involves our faith, our thoughts, our attitudes, and our behaviors towards others in the world around us, but also our our thoughts, attitudes, and behaviors towards ourselves.
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So these four qualities that I've mentioned really are gonna help us with our self-acceptance, our ability to have authentic, positive self-talk and to really experience continuous growth. All of those things contribute to forming a robust foundation upon which true lasting confidence is built. And this can be Christ centered confidence. So by understanding and embodying these traits, any Christian woman, any of you listening to this, can cultivate and become the epitome of an assured, poised woman who is ready to face whatever life throws her way with faith and grace. Thank you so much for joining me on this week's episode, friend. I hope you have a wonderful week. Hey, Fran, thank you so much for joining me for today's episode. I love having these little chats with you once a week. If any of these episodes that you've listened to for me have benefited your life directly, it would mean the world to me if you would just take a moment, pop in, give me a five star review so that more people have access to what I'm sharing, and so you and I can spread the love. Thank you.
