Faith-Based Confidence for Ambitious Christian Women

Listen to Faith-Based Confidence for Ambitious Christian Women

00:04 

Hey there and welcome. Are you a woman who is unapologetically ambitious, but you're also deeply focused on honoring God, loving your family well and pursuing meaningful work? Well, you've come to the right place. My name is Dana Byers and you and I are going to be fast friends. Let's get started.  

 

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Before we get started today, I wanna take just a moment and share with you a recent five star review that my podcast received. Hannah says, this is a practical god-centered podcast that is full of applicable strategies and supportive encouragement. I'm so happy I found this. Thank you, Dana, for sharing from your heart and from your life. I cannot recommend this podcast enough. Hannah, thank you for taking the time to share this five star review. And if you're listening to this episode right now and any of my episodes previously have been helpful to you, it would mean the world to me. If you would take just a moment to leave me a five star review that's going to help us connect with so many more people than I could ever do on my own.  

 

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Hello. Hello and happy Tuesday if you're listening to this in real time when this episode drops. This is Dana Byers, welcome back to Been There, learned That. Friends, we are recording right now, episode 43. You know what that says to me? We are rounding the corner on a year of episodes in this podcast. So I just wanna take a moment and celebrate that. Thank God for just the fun idea. The invitation he gave me, I think it was the idea, dropped maybe October, November, 2023 to start this little podcast. And our audience is growing, the impact is growing, and my desire is for at least one woman listening to this today to be encouraged to hear from God, to take a step of faith because of what I share with you. So I'm thrilled that you're here with me for today's episode. Let's keep going on this fun podcast journey.  

 

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Well, today I wanna talk about faith-based confidence tips for Christian women. Now, you know, I have a course called The 10 Hour Confidence Transformation Course. Confidence is not arrogance, I believe confidence is something we develop as we draw closer to God, as we lean in, in faith, as we practice obedience and live out lives of godly influence in all of our spheres of life. So I wanna talk about some faith-based confidence tips to share with you because these are things that you can employ to help you flex and strengthen your confidence muscles. Okay, the first tip I have for you is this one's gonna sound really simple and you're gonna say, Dana, this is basic, but it's not. My clients and I talk about this a lot, and that is to start your day with prayer and scripture. So beginning each morning with even just a moment of prayer, acknowledging God, inviting him into your day, reading a little bit of the Bible, this helps you set a positive tone for your day.  

 

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It's gonna ground you in God's Word. It's gonna remind you of his presence in your life. Few things bring me more confidence than remembering. I'm not alone. God is with me. His holy spirit lives within me and will guide me. So if you would choose a specific verse or a passage, you could keep it on your screensaver on your phone, or you could text it to yourself, take a screenshot of it and maybe meditate on that throughout the day. These are things you can do that would just help you feel supported so that you can show up feeling more confident in how you show up every day. Now, a little caveat here I wanna say is let's not be legalistic about this, okay? It would break my heart if you listened to my podcast and thought that this is a podcast where you're going to learn a lot about legalism and religiosity.  

 

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That is not me and that is not my goal. If you are looking for that, this probably isn't the best place for you, okay? I'm not saying you have to, you know, spend an hour in your Bible and pray all the time, every day. I'm saying start somewhere. God will meet you where you are at. Now there's a really good chance, fair warning, that the more time you spend with him, the more you're going to want to. But I don't want this to be just a habit that you have to check off a list and a perfunctory approach. I think that inviting God into your day reading a little bit of his word is going to increase your confidence. The second faith-based confidence tip I have for you is to anchor your identity in Christ. Remind yourself that your worth is not determined by external achievements.  

 

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Your worth is not defined by others' opinions, but by who you are in Christ. You are a daughter of the king, the savior of the world knows your name, loves you, is with you, is for you. If that is your identity, instead of you know your child's mother or instead of your job title, or instead of your net worth, that your identity in Christ is what is going to help you stay afloat so that regardless of what happens in your life ups and downs, you will be able to maintain a God-honoring confidence because your identity is rooted in who God is and not in who you think you have to perform to be. So there are some great key scriptures that can affirm your identity in Christ, such as Ephesians two 10 or one Peter two nine. A third tip would be to surround yourself with faithful support.  

 

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You know, I went too many years without faithful support in my life, and I would say that a big contribution to that was the fact that our family moved a lot over the years. But I do take responsibility for not having support everywhere that I was. There were times it felt impossible, but it probably wasn't completely impossible. I struggled to maybe build trust in some communities or to feel that I was valued or to feel that I could get authentic feedback. So a lot of that is on me. But looking back over the years, I've noticed that my confidence is higher when I have built a community of fellow believers who encourage and uplift me. And when I'm doing the same for them, I can share my struggles, I can be vulnerable, I can share my victories with this community. I can ask them to pray and to give me support.  

 

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And that is something that helps me feel so supported and confident in showing up in my day to day life. So a great way to do this, of course, is to start somewhere joining a Bible study group, maybe a fellowship group or a Christian women's network group or luncheon. It would be amazing for you to have the support that you need to be able to show up in all the roles and invitations that God has given you in your life. Trust me when I say my confidence is significantly different, different based upon how I am engaged in local community. So tip number four of a faith-based confidence growth would be to embrace God's promises. You can reflect on God's promises and let them guide your thoughts and your actions. You've heard before, I'm sure this phrase in the church about encouraging yourself in the Lord.  

 

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So I just mentioned in the previous tip, tip number three. Of course, we need support and community, but we also have to have our own backs. God's promises in his Word, they provide you assurance and hope, and those are essential for building your confidence. And a great way to embrace God's promises is to write them out, to keep a journal of his promises, refer back to it regularly, especially during challenging times. So you're not only writing his promises out that you come across in His word when you're studying, or maybe when someone shares it with you. But you are also reflecting on where you are right now and what that promise means to you, or how God has been faithful and how he responded to a prayer need. Looking back on these journals is such a gift that you can give your future self by reminding yourself all that God has done and how he is entirely capable of walking through, walking you through whatever you're facing today.  

 

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God's promises can be a source of confidence for us, not because of our performance of course, but because of who he is. Tip number five is to practice gratitude. You know, developing the habit of thanking God for his blessings, seeing him in everything that shifts our focus from what is lacking in our lives to what we already have. It fosters a positive mindset, not a toxic positivity, but a genuine, relatable, just positive mindset of, you know what? This is rough, but God, I see you in this. I have faith. You have already provided X, Y, Z. And if you are going to, as I mentioned in the last tip, if you're gonna keep a journal of God's promises, you could also add in there just some things you're grateful for. Maybe three things at the end of the day that you were thankful for. I have one client who said when she goes to bed at night, she puts her head on the pillow and she just thinks of three things that were amazing that day.  

 

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And often they're really little things that are so sweet and it just moves her sometimes to think about how God is in the details, sweet moments that she had with a friend or an answer to prayer that she wasn't expecting. Those things actually not only usher her into great sleep, which is important for all of us women leaders, but also it just reminds her how faithful God is. So tip number six, for the faith-based confidence tips is to serve others with love. Now you might think, okay, Dana, this is obvious. I don't know that it is. I went back and forth and decided I'm gonna keep this on the list and here's why. When I get busy, one of the first things that I guess I'll say kind of drops from my intentionality or drops from my schedule is serving others, reflecting Christ's love. I might show up, but I'm not necessarily present.  

 

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And I think confidence grows when we serve others, when we see that we're able to be fully engaged in something where we might not get anything from it just acts of kindness or service that benefit others. But it can also reinforce our sense of purpose and worth that God has given us spiritual gifts that we can utilize and employ and we don't have to wear ourselves out and we don't have to do everything for a paycheck. We don't have to do everything for accolades if we, you know, volunteer at our church or in our community. We can look for small ways to serve others in our daily life, not to build up our ego, but instead to live out in faith that God can work through us and we can have a quiet, calm confidence that he is at work through us without, without us really needing any accolades.  

 

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And also when we're serving others, it allows us to increase our confidence that you know, I'm not on my phone during that time, or I'm not out coaching a client at that time when I'm serving others necessarily. So I'm able to step away from my business and things that might unintentionally hook my ego or things where I might be putting my identity in. Instead, I get to shift that on serving others with love. Okay, tip number seven is to stay connected or get connected to the local church. Now there's a lot to unpack here that is not the purpose of this episode. I understand. You know, I've worked in multiple churches, I've been part of the church pretty much all of my life. One of my earliest memories is going to church, a really sweet memory from when I was little and grew up in a small town in northern Indiana at a really sweet little church.  

 

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However, over the years, because the church is com comprised of humans, some of my biggest hurts have happened in the church. And I have certainly not been a perfect churchgoer or a church staff member either. So I understand there's a lot to unpack there. I'm not giving this tip again from a place of legalism, that's not my goal. But I wanna invite you to stay connected or get reconnected to a local church to consider that because regular participation in our church services and community worship community events that can strengthen your faith and connect you with other believers that can increase your sense of confidence in the community around you and lessen any sense of aloneness that you might have in fulfilling God's call on your life. So getting involved in services regularly just helps us build a habit of trusting God with the possibility that we could trust other people in the church, other people in the church could love us well.  

 

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And so that's just an imitation for me to you to consider that as a means of increasing your confidence in your capacity to show up in your day-to-day life by reaping from the benefits available of being connected to a local church. Tip number eight is to speak life. I think you can use God's word to build yourself and others up. You can speak life over yourself. This aligns your thoughts with God's truth. I love doing this in coaching sessions with my clients. You know, this is not really about pulling a random passage outta scripture out of context and just claiming it for ourselves. It's not for that, that's really not what we do. But we are able to connect with God and look at our thoughts, and I can help my clients really recognize how she's allowing a thought to negatively impact her and then work through that, through a coaching tool, through a process to help her identify some of God's truth that would actually serve her better in the season that she is in.  

 

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And she uses that thought prayerfully as a meditation invites other people into that to reframe and reapproach whatever she's struggling with, with a more authentic, healthier sense of spiritual, mental, physical, and emotional energy. So tip number nine, to build your confidence is to focus your energy on trusting in God's plan, focusing on resting in the knowledge that God has a great plan for your life. Now, I'm not saying our lives are easy because we follow Jesus. Don't hear me say any of that, but his sovereignty, who he is, the fact that his son Jesus defeated death and was resurrected and covered all of our sins, he took that away for us, something we could never do for ourselves. Trusting in God's sovereignty can bring you peace and confidence, even in uncertain times. You know, right now there are a lot of countries facing uncertainty based upon their leadership.  

 

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I would also say that is true right here in the United States where I live and the knowledge that God is in control, the the trust in his sovereignty brings me a sense of peace and confidence regardless of what I see happening around me, regardless of the uncertainty. So trusting in God's plan, even if we love where things are headed or if we don't love where things are headed, is something that takes some of that unnecessary responsibility we've put on ourselves. It takes some of that off of us and puts it back in its proper place, which is at the feet of God, which is his. It's his responsibility. You know, I heard one coach say it this way, there's three types of business in this world. And she said, you know, there's my business, there's other people's business and there's God's business. And I love that it's a little bit simplistic, but it's also really powerful because when I find myself worried about things that are not my business or responsibility, I'm actually wasting my energy.  

 

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I'm actually getting in the way. I don't need to tell other people how to live their lives if it's someone else's business. And then even more so, there are things that are God's business that I meddle with, I get in the middle of, I try to control. And so one way to shift out of that, to actually have more confidence is to step back and say, you know what? God, I'm going to do my part as you guide me, but I am trusting also in your sovereignty. I'm receiving an exchange for that, your peace and a sense of confidence, not only in how I can show up, but a greater confidence at your role in this situation. Alright, tip number 10 is to cultivate a spirit of forgiveness. I have learned personally, friends that holding onto grudges or past mistakes can really hinder our confidence.  

 

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Embracing forgiveness, like forgiving ourselves and forgiving other people as Christ forgave us. That frees us from guilt and resentment. And honestly, I don't know many things that have impacted my health more than a sense of guilt or resentment. They've impacted my health negatively, I've allowed them to in seasons in my life. But the ability to pray for the strength to forgive others and to forgive myself is something that has radically changed my life. I'm a different woman because of God's help. The Holy Spirit's help in my life and cultivating a spirit of forgiveness. I have a lot of opportunity to grow in this area. But starting with forgiving myself for things I didn't know, things I got wrong and admitting that has been so freeing, it's literally a weight lifted off of me. And recognizing that no matter what happens if whether a person you know hurts me, whether I unintentionally hurt a person, knowing that I have the ability to forgive, to ask for forgiveness, and to forgive myself, to seek God for help in those areas, that actually increases my confidence because I got to such a point in my life years ago where my heart and my mind were basically shut off to a lot of things because I didn't wanna be hurt anymore.  

 

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And when we get to that point, we actually miss out on so much of the goodness of life that God offers us. And so knowing that the approach of cultivating that spirit of forgiveness for myself and for others, inviting God into circumstances meant that I could open up my heart again, meant that I could free myself from a fear of being hurt and instead I could enjoy life. So that is tip number 10. That really increased my confidence to be able to cultivate a spirit of forgiveness. Tip number 11 is to seek wisdom and guidance. Make it a habit to seek God's wisdom in your decisions and actions. Make it a habit to seek the wisdom of trusted people in your life who follow Jesus as you're making decisions and taking actions. Now, you don't have to ask them for everything, but I do think that inviting God into most of your life is very important.  

 

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But you may not have to ask all the people around you for all sorts of decisions that you're making, but I think you've got a treasure trove of wisdom available by inviting God in. And the thing is, I've heard the phrase said before in the church that you know God is a gentleman, he doesn't force himself into our lives. So even if you've already accepted Christ as your savior and you're walking in relationship with him, and you are what you know in the church, we would say as saved person, you may not be inviting God into your life every day. And it's an easy habit to forget. It's an easy habit to drop. But asking God, Hey, God, what do you think about this? Or asking God, Hey, here's what I'm gonna do. I know that you know my plans, but if I'm on the wrong tracks, would you just stop me?  

 

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God, I'm willing for you to change the circumstances in such a way that let me know, you want me to switch gears that let me know you want me to turn right or left instead of head forward. God's guidance will direct you on the right path, and that's going to boost your confidence because you're not alone in making decisions and in seeking guidance. And I'm so thankful that when I ask God for wisdom, he gives it to me. One of my friends taught me this beautiful prayer that I've been praying a lot over the last, I don't know, maybe six or or 12 months. And that is, God, would you give me wisdom beyond my years so that no matter what age we are, would he give us wisdom beyond our years? Not for a typical person of my age, but I need more wisdom than that, right?  

 

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I think God is such a generous God that he loves when we pray big prayer and ask for big things. And I love to ask him for wisdom beyond my years so that I am able to follow his guidance and have confidence in the decisions that I'm making. Okay, the last tip for faith-based confidence building for Christian women is tip number 12. And that is just to reflect on God's faithfulness. Remind yourself of past instances where God has been faithful in your life. This reflection builds up trust that builds that confidence muscle and his continued faithfulness. Because you and I both know we are human. There will be days where we are not as faithful as God is, but he is steady, he is trustworthy, he is consistent. And I, I have a tip to share with you. I have a client who created a faithfulness jar and she would just write down on little, you know, post-it notes and put it in the jar whenever something happened where she really experienced God's faithfulness and when she was feeling frustrated, she would pull out that jar and review those things to encourage herself in the Lord.  

 

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It is not that God is not faithful. It is that we often forget to recognize it. Reminding yourself of his faithfulness to you is going to increase your sense of confidence and your capacity to navigate whatever comes today and in your future. So friends, building this faith-based confidence through these 12 tips, this is gonna involve a combination of, of course, your spiritual practices, some community support and personal growth that is grounded in God's truth. By incorporating these tips into your daily life, you can develop a really strong and unwavering sense of confidence that is rooted not in who you are, but in your faith in Christ and in who God is. Well, thank you so much for joining me for this week's episode. I hope you have a wonderful week, and I'll catch you soon. Are you a Christian working woman who is looking to boost your confidence and transform your life? Well, I have got just the thing for you, my online course. The 10 hour Confidence transformation is available now. This course is designed to fit into your busy schedule and provide you with actionable strategies to increase your confidence. Plus, with your purchase, you will get access to a private monthly group coaching call where we can connect and grow together. Get all the details right now@danabycoaching.com.

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