Interview: Thriving Beyond Burnout (A Coach’s Tale)
Listen to Interview: Thriving Beyond Burnout (A Coach’s Tale)
00:04
Hey there and welcome. Are you a woman who is unapologetically ambitious, but you're also deeply focused on honoring God, loving your family well and pursuing meaningful work? Well, you've come to the right place. My name is Dana Byers and you and I are going to be fast friends. Let's get started.
00:29
Hey friends, you are in for such a treat today. I recorded a special interview with one of my coaches, Carla Miller, and I asked her to record it just for the women who are my paid clients. But then I asked her for permission to go ahead and share it here on the podcast because the honest truth is her story is so powerful. I think if any of you could listen to it, it's gonna show you what coaching can do, how God partners with women who are open to change, to see things shift in their lives and experience powerful breakthroughs. So here we go. Listen to Carla's story. Well, hey there everyone, I have such a fun video for you right now. This is my friend Carla. Carla, and you say hello.
01:16
Hello everyone.
01:17
Yeah, so Carla and I go way back. I don't know if we wanna say how far back we go, but we go pretty far back. Carla, you and me. More than
01:26
Half a lifetime, let's put it that way. That's
01:28
For sure. Yes, yes. And Carla is the coach who you've heard me talk about. She is the coach. This is the woman right here on the call who coached me back when I experienced burnout for the last time. And Carla was a big part of that for the last time. I think it was maybe 2017. I'm, I'm not quite sure when it was Carla. I know
01:50
The year fly. Yes. Something like
01:52
That. Here's why. Yes, we we're still so young, but the years have flown and Carla and I would meet up at a McDonald's on Michigan Road in Indianapolis. I remember sitting in that booth with an unsweetened iced tea crying in our coaching meetings.
02:16
And Carla, you were so professional, you were so gracious. You always are. And I think I just wanna set the stage a little bit before we dive in to make sure if women haven't heard that part of my story, that, you know, I have always loved all the jobs God has given me to do. I've always loved my family, but I hit a crucial point in my life where we hit a rough patch with some things going on with a loved one in my family. And then we also, I hit a rough patch at work and I was trying to navigate both of those. I thought I was inviting God into it and I was to some degree, but I was also trying to do a lot out of my own strength. And that is completely my recipe for burnout. I noticed I had this habit of going on and on and on, and my relationships are at work kind of trying to push through or white knuckle things.
03:06
I thought I was resilient, but really I was a little bit more of an egocentric focus on achievement and just getting the job done at whatever task. And I would wear myself out physically. So I started meeting with Carla. I actually was seeing a counselor at that time, and the irony was, I just thought, I don't have time and I don't have money for this. And yet I couldn't have think, I couldn't think of a better way to have spent that time or that money. Carla, you what? The little bit that I invested towards so much into my life that now years later, I not only received the benefit of going through the Energy Leadership Index with you, but now I've become certified through the institute professional excellence and coaching, just like you went ahead of me and did that. So Carla, welcome. We're gonna chat about confidence and energy, but before we get started, I wanna start in a way that I think you'll appreciate because I know that you love a good game. Is that right? I
04:09
Do. I do love a good game.
04:11
So I would say it's a game game, but it is fun. And I also know one of your values is fun, so let's have a little bit of fun.
04:17
Sounds perfect.
04:18
Okay. I didn't even tell you this was gonna happen. I knew.
04:21
No, this is smart the moment, but I'm up for it.
04:24
So I've got 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 cards here. Pick one. And we're gonna do a little icebreaker question.
04:30
All right. Let's do five. It's my favorite number.
04:34
Okay. Alright. Okay. I'm a coach. So I have to ask you, I'm curious, why is five your favorite number, Carla?
04:42
It when I was very little, for some reason I just thought it seemed like a huge number 'cause it was a whole hand. And I remember telling, my mom would always say, what's your favorite number? And I would say, is it five? And so I've always just been inspired by five. And then now that's my, that was my sports number in. Oh really? High school. And then of course now it's the number of my family members. So Nice. I just have always liked five. Yeah. I grew up in a family of five, so I guess it's just always been my favorite number.
05:12
Okay. Well I'm so glad I asked Five's all around. Thank you Carlos. Yeah,
05:16
You're welcome. Alright.
05:17
Ooh, I love this question. What did you see recently that warmed your heart?
05:24
Oh goodness. We as a family went to the movie Unsung Hero this past weekend. That is the background story for those of you don't know, of the Small Bone Family, which was Rebecca St. James, and now the singers for Four King and Country. And so we went as a family this weekend and I was just really warmed by their faith journey and the way that God led them to America and sustained them. And the way that they continued to grow closer as a family through all the trials and tribulations that came their way. So that would be something I saw recently that warmed my heart.
06:04
Oh, I love that. Thank you for sharing that, Carla. Yeah, absolutely. I see some of your values in that answer as well. You have a big value for family for sure.
06:12
Yes. That's really sweet. Absolutely. And faith.
06:14
And faith. Absolutely. Yes, yes, yes. Well, I, given that you are ahead of me in this journey, this understanding of the Energy Leadership Index, this understanding of building godly authentic confidence by having a self-awareness about the way God created us and kind of how we show up with our different energy levels. I thought it would be really incredible to hear from you after you've coached women for so many years to share with us, you know, maybe some of your observations. I'd love to hear what are your observations on how women can maximize their understanding of kind of their energy levels and how they show up when it comes to their careers, how they're showing up at work and the way they present themselves? What are some observations that you've made over the years?
07:07
I have found that energy levels are critical for your professional life. Personal life, every single aspect of your life. They're really critical. And I have a very similar story to the power of the Energy Leadership Index that I'll share a little bit later how I actually stumbled upon this myself and the difference that it made in my own world. But when I work with clients who are specifically focused on their professional life and wanting to grow and change their, or maybe they feel stuck there or perhaps they're just promoted to a new position and they're trying to get their feet under them and figure out what they can do, I've found that there's three major ways that they can use the Energy Leadership Index and knowing their own assessment. The first thing that I've really found is that they use it to manage their own triggers.
08:01
And so often they'll start to to recognize, oh, every time I meet with my boss, I, I drop to this energy level. Or every time I go into this meeting and, and or this topic comes up, I feel anxious or anxiety and I slip into level one. And so they start to recognize their own patterns in the workplace when they're aware of Energy Leadership Index and then they start to recognize, this isn't really how I want to show up as a leader. This really isn't me at home. This isn't really me in this volunteer role. I don't wanna be this version of me here either. And so they start to be able to recognize, oh, I can choose differently. And they can create a plan around how they wanna respond. And that is so powerful to them to recognize that they're no longer following the impact of what is happening to them.
09:02
They're not responding anymore or reacting anymore. They're responding in a way that they want to respond. So that's been huge for my clients that I've worked with to be able to manage their own triggers. Another really, really powerful thing, and I think almost equally as beneficial, is those clients that I work with that are managing others, it gives them the ability to understand where their team members are coming from, where their coworkers are coming from, and to be able to know what those particular individuals need for support. So for example, I've had clients who have an underperformer that they have to address some of their team members lack of results with and have that quote unquote tough conversation or work improvement plan. And so they can use the energy levels to understand how to come alongside and support that employee, whether they're feeling overwhelmed, there's some certain action steps you can take, whether they're feeling angry or frustrated or burnt out, there's some action steps you can take.
10:16
And so it's been really helpful them to learn how to support their team better by using energy leadership. They can also lead from the bottom up. I say that sometimes, you know, not all managers are created equally and sometimes you're blessed with an amazing manager who's very supportive and gives you exactly what you need. But other times you may have an experience with a manager that is just exceptional at their job, but perhaps not the best leader. And you can use energy leadership to, as I call it, lead from the bottom up in those scenarios as well. And the third or fourth way that I've really seen clients utilize this in the workforce is navigating company-wide communication. Though I actually had a client who came to me on our coaching call very upset because she recognized that the tone set from the CEO down was very toxic.
11:21
It was very level two language. And she was told to pass this on to her team. Well she doesn't operate at level two. She has a very much a level five energy and mentality. And she did not want to lead with that sort of controlling aura around it. And so she was able to tweak her language, tweak the way the approach, and it went so much better and better. And she was again, was able to address and recognize this was bothering her because she did not resonate at this level. But this was the communication, this was the language coming from the C-suite. And so within the workplace, it is just invaluable to know that energy leadership because it helps you lead yourself, it helps you lead your team, it helps you navigate the culture of the entire company. Yes. And those are some ways I've seen that really play out.
12:22
This is so rich, Carla. Thank you. These examples are just spot on. 'cause I'm thinking about women I work with and what you've shared. I'm looking at my notes here, I've got a lot of notes already. What you've shared is how we can have confidence in empowering ourselves with a self-awareness of noticing the themes, this is how I'm presenting myself, or when I feel triggered by my boss for example, I can actually show up differently. So there's an empowerment there. And then you really went to a sense of empathy, not only with leading up but with leading the people on our team. I think that's something I don't hear a lot about. And I love that you shined a kind of a spotlight on this, Carla, that we can lead with empathy, lead up or lead our team with empathy by trying to appropriately assess where their energy levels might be and not judge them for it, but use our example to potentially invite them into an experience of a higher energy level.
13:28
You know, maybe from like just that strict responsibility level of level three, inviting them up to a, a level four or level five would be amazing that win-win. And then that example you shared of the company wide communication being toxic and not reflecting your client here, that's someone who, I think you said was an executive, maybe even the CEO of the company. But she understood, she had the confidence to feel empowered to improve upon what was happening without making judgment, without putting anyone down, but to improve the experience. And those are the things that I think is where, if you will, the magic kind of comes in with energy levels where she's improving the employee's experience and she's not the CEO, like we get to have impact on others' lives by taking the time to truly become self-aware, it improves our experience of life, but also blesses those who interact with us around us. It's just incredible.
14:25
Absolutely. It is absolutely incredible. And you know, being able to process that outside of the work environment was someone who understood the energy level and she was, she was tempted to be drawn into that. She said, I just feel very angry. She was having the emotions of that level two energy and then we were able to look at it and she, it clicked, ah, here's why it's bothering me because they're operating from this energy level. I'm getting sucked into that and I don't wanna choose that and then choose to separate. So again, just the ability to get outside and to process that, to go through what that looks like and why she was drawn to that.
15:05
I remember chatting with you briefly about a level two kind of experience. I was feeling at work and this was years ago, but I just remember you letting me know, well you don't have to stay there. And I was kind of like, what do you mean I don't have to stay here?
15:19
Like this is not
15:20
There, you know? Right. And the, and it didn't mean that the circumstance changed, but my experience of that circumstance changed by looking at that level two energy fully in the face and allowing myself to feel it. I validated myself and then it was like, okay, yeah, this does stink, but I wanna show up differently even if the other person won't engage with me at the level five that I really want them to, because that allows me to sleep well at night. Not because I'm better than them, I'm not, but because I have a sense of inner confidence that I honored God. I honored myself and I honored that other person in the interaction even though he wouldn't meet me eye to eye in our conflict at work. So that was just a beautiful thing that you said that stuck with me, Carla, all these years later. So I of course I can see that you have another client who's figuring that out for herself as well. You're so great at helping us do that.
16:15
Well, thank you Dana.
16:16
Well let's take a look now and shift gears just a little bit. Same question, but I wanna understand your observations on how women can kind of maximize their understanding of their energy levels and kind of how they show up their index assessment results. Not at work this time, but now, you know, at in their home life, whether they're married, they might be moms. How, what can we learn from your observations with your clients?
16:42
Clients? Yeah, you know, it's very interesting because I was starting to make a very specific list and then I backed up the train and I thought, actually it's the same thing. And so if you think about it, what we can do at home, we recognize our own triggers. Yes. You know, maybe it's not a boss that's cranky, but maybe it's a husband that comes home and dumps all this stuff at the door when you just clean the the room. Yeah. Or maybe it's children who come home, teens in my case, who come home and don't have a nice word to say about their day and are, you know, already in that negative. So, so again, it's the same thing, recognizing what our triggers are at home so that we can recognize is this the mom I want to be? Am I showing up the way that I feel like God would want me to in this particular situation?
17:37
Am I creating a positive environment for my family to come home to if I'm at home before them? Or when I do come home, am I raising them up to the higher energy levels because that's where I'm resonating. And so again, we can do the same thing as recognizing our own triggers. The other thing that, the second thing was using it to manage others or talk to others. Obviously we managed to some degree our kids. Yeah. And so we can again, use the energy levels to understand where they're coming from. Are they, are they coming from a place of level one where they're feeling overwhelmed and perhaps they just need some support or they need someone to sit down and help them come up with a plan so that they know what they're doing and not as anxious anymore. Do they just need someone to listen to them so they can vent and get out all of those negative emotions?
18:33
And again, using these same tools that we use to support our team, we can definitely use to support our husband or our spouse or our children as well. And then the third thing, it was, again, communication. We can use that when we communicate with our kids, we can come from a level four or a level five communication. And again, when we can communicate using that language, using that specific vocabulary from energy levels four or five, six, then that's just gonna elevate the mood, the emotion, the energy, the tone in the entire home. And so ironically, the same things that we use at work are the same ways usually that we use it at home, but sometimes we're not as good at recognizing it at home because we're steeped in that. Yes. We have so much background history there in our home. And so sometimes it, we may need to get a little outside feedback from a coach, from a counselor, from our spouse, some honest feedback on the things that are our triggers in that situation. Because sometimes I don't think it's quite as easy to see those since we are so steeped in history in our home.
19:55
I agree with you. I think the, the ability to recognize or notice the themes at home Yes. Are kind of like the first big domino that can actually improve things everywhere else. I mean, I'm just speaking from my own experience, but I've seen that happen for many women. They think the block is at work and it might be, there could definitely be a block there, but home is our safe place. So we're a little bit less sensitive to the ongoing frustrations because we don't plan on leaving. You know, we, yes, we love our family. We're we're gonna, we're gonna stick around and, and stay through it. So because of that, because there could be a temporary approach to our job, when I'm coaching women, they're like, well, maybe I should just leave. Well at home. We don't think that way generally. So the ability for us to say, wait, I could actually improve the environment by starting there, that would be a really cool approach. I think for any of the women listening to this who might be really frustrated at work, you could maybe switch gears, give your brain a break,
20:58
Right.
20:58
And let yourself use that creative approach and just improve your home experience. A coaching question that came to mind when you were sharing Carla, was the question of how do I contribute to my home environment? Love that. Like you said, once I really started becoming more intentional about my energy levels, my home became a much less negative place. Was it extremely negative? I wouldn't say so, but my experience of being in my home meant that I got to lead in ways that invited people into just healthier communication. And I would see my kids maturing. And I just thought, wow, this is amazing. Well, they didn't have as great of an example as they could have had. And so they started making better choices in their communication. And it was just this beautiful kind of benevolent upward cycle. Yes. Yes. Of improving that environment. And that inspired me to be able to bring authentic, positive energy to work where I was able to tackle those relationships in a better way too.
21:58
I love that. It it's the wheel of life, right? Life. Yes. When we, when we improve one area of our wheel, it's gonna bump out the entire wheel. Yes. We have more energy and more capacity. Yes.
22:09
That's so true.
22:10
And I don't know if you heard this, I, I think I came from coaching school, but when one individual changes, the relationship changes. Ah. And I thought that is so true. We can't, we can't necessarily change someone else, but when we change our dynamic with that other person changes. And that is just such a powerful place. Yeah.
22:32
Yes. And it's so encouraging too, isn't it? To,
22:35
It is
22:35
So empowered to step forward with confident action that this relationship is going to change because I'm committed to intentionally showing up in a way that I have my own back, but I also care about the relationship. And that's just, that's just an incredible thought. Very energizing.
22:51
It's, it is. Absolutely.
22:53
Well, let's talk about limiting beliefs. Limiting beliefs are such a fascinating topic to me. I think, you know, this is a good segue because we were just talking about how at home sometimes we don't notice our patterns of behavior or the triggers because we're so used to it. Limiting beliefs could, we can be completely blindsided by them because we've been living with them for so long, haven't been, they're like the invisible friend we didn't know was there, but except they're not really friends,
23:20
So, right.
23:21
What are some common limiting beliefs that you have seen women work through in order to go kind of from that level 1, 2, 3 energy towards a level five energy? What would be some common beliefs you've noticed?
23:34
Well, a little bit about my specific niche. I, I have a child with special needs. I have a daughter that has a very rare, very rare genetic disorder. And so we have, we have done a lot of specialist over the years, more than, more than a, more than double digits. We've done so many, so many specialists for her. And so because that was so much a part of our journey and my story and motherhood, it makes sense. I was drawn a lot of moms who had that similar pathway were drawn to me. So there were a lot of, and I'll just say this challenge is blank. This challenge is terrible. This disability is overwhelming. So that seemed to be a common theme. And honestly, that was what I started the limiting belief that I started with. That this is go, I'm just gonna have to deal with this the rest of my life.
24:32
It'll never be amazing. It'll never be good, but I'm gonna learn how to make lemonade out of this. Lemon was basically where I had gotten to in my life. And that is a very common theme that I have heard from. It may be special needs, it may be marriage, it may be career, whatever that thing is that is a common limiting belief or Gail, that I hear when I am coaching several of my clients. So that would probably be the one that sticks out to me. It looks different in different people's lives, but the, the message is the same. This whatever it is, is terrible. So very relatable. Yeah. Yes, yes. So what would, can I share a little of my story about Oh yes, that would, how would wonderful, I would love it. How that impacted. So my own story of recognizing the power of energy leadership really came from this same experience.
25:38
I have triplets, so motherhood was just kind of crazy from the get go. And not too, not too long into that we recognized, you know, our daughter was just not quite developing the same way as our other two. You could see that perfectly clear when they're the same age. And so we started down this path of investigating like any mom and trying to figure out what it would take to support her and what she needed and if there was a piece that we were missing. And as I mentioned, we didn't find out literally until she was 15 about her rare genetic disorder. And so for so long I was managing all of her health needs 'cause this specialist could help me with this component, this specialist could help me with this component, but no one could put all the pieces together that was on me.
26:27
I was the one doing all of that. And, and as a result, like I said, I had started off that overwhelmed level one, I'd kind of gotten angry, frustrated that this was my journey. And I'd probably gotten up to about an energy level three where I was coping and tolerating with this situation. And I thought that was probably as good as it was going to get. I had my faith, I believed that God had a plan that he, you know, he would do some good things from this. But I still believe that it was a, a bad thing intrinsically that I was just a challenge I was gonna be to dealt with, to, to deal with. And I distinctly remember Dana going through the IPEC coaching program, reading the energy leadership book. And it was as if a, a phrase jumped off at me off the page and it was, what's the opportunity here?
27:21
And it was almost like God spoke to me in that moment. And I just remember answering almost out loud, there is no opportunity in this. This is, this is bad. You know, this is, this is hard. And then I just remember, I think the Holy Spirit whispering to me, but what if there is, and that started everything changing because then I started pondering what if, what if there is something good that could come of this? And I started to, to, instead of looking at what was wrong, to start to look for the opportunity of what, what could be right about this? And everything shifted from that moment, that weight that I had been caring for so long just began to melt away. And I just began to see the goodness of what God had done by allowing this to be a part of our story.
28:17
I, I appreciate things about life that I never would have if I didn't have my daughter. I understand what really matters in life, what the real meaning of life is. I was able to pursue coaching because I probably wouldn't have, I wouldn't have known about it if I hadn't needed some help and support myself. And I absolutely love this profession. I love getting to help and walk alongside other women. And so I began to see more and more and more that this was actually an opportunity for good things. And as you know, from energy leadership that's shifting from level one up to that level five or level six, where we see that there is a meaning and a purpose and there's opportunity in everything and it's not bad. And I was re-energized and I got my Carla self back as I would say. Yeah. And so my own journey with understanding energy leadership is really what shifted me from coping and tolerating to really feeling like I was thriving again.
29:22
And so I just wanted to give this gift to other women. And so no surprise, a lot of the moms are drawn to my story and they all have their own thing or you know, that they consider their heart or their bad that they're coping and tolerating with. And so we work a lot on looking for those opportunities, shifting our energy, changing our thoughts around that. And for my clients who have a faith, you know, tapping into the Bible promises, you know, that God can't work for good all things for the good and it's looking for his good and his glory and all of those things. So that is my own story with energy leadership. And that came out of coaching and studying it and it was so transformative to me that it really became the gift I love to give to other people who were seeking for that as well.
30:19
Yes, Carla, thank you for sharing that. I mean, what a beautiful story and you, you share it so eloquently that I'm sure it doesn't completely reflect all of the, the true pain and agony and a heartbreak that you've experienced over the years. And I just wanna acknowledge that in you because I know that, I know you've walked through that. Now I don't understand it nearly as much as you do, but in my limited understanding, I know you have, and I'm gonna show appreciation for that. And I also just wanna thank God for that because whenever we talk about shifting energy, there's no forced thinking. You know, I'll tell clients, I'm not gonna tell you to believe anything, you know, that's, that is not worth your time or your money and you don't wanna lie to yourself.
31:00
Right.
31:00
Like, you can surrender these thoughts to God and invite him in to shift your perspective. That's right. He does the heavy lifting and your story is the beautiful example of that because you were, you've always been a tireless advocate for your daughter. But when you had that mind shift, what I hear you saying is you remain a tireless advocate for her, but you're also a tireless advocate for yourself now. Like you recognize you can thrive in the midst of this experience so that you get to show up the way you want to as a mom, but also as a coach. Yes. And as a wife, and as a friend, and as a volunteer at church and all these other beautiful aspects of your life that you get to do without burning out because the scenario that did bring pain now is contributing to your thriving because of your appreciation for it.
31:53
Yeah, exactly. Exactly. When your perspective on your pain shifts, it becomes your opportunity to, to be a helper and to help yourself, like you said. Yes.
32:05
That, that question that comes out of this that I, I wanna make sure everyone hears is what's the opportunity here that yeah. There be open to the possibility of an opportunity and then you suddenly had this long list of things that God showed you that could be opportunities. Yes. So thank you for sharing that. Yes.
32:22
Incredible. Absolutely incredible. Absolutely.
32:25
Well, one more thing I wanted to just talk about holistically was, you know, you do coach a lot. Well, I think pretty much most of the women you coach, many of them are in career roles. They're working outside of the home. Many of them follow Jesus, many of them are moms.
32:43
Yes.
32:43
What would you say would be part of the natural journey for the women that you're coaching to watch them go from maybe coming in frustrated with something that led them to kind of jump off into the abyss, you know, in faith that this coaching thing might actually work for them,
33:00
Support them, they
33:02
Come and you know, something gets them to the point where they're willing to, to work through it. They hire you, work with you. What would you say is a common journey for a woman in this last question where they go from the point of frustration to a point of confidence and of course, I mean confidence that is rooted in who they are in Christ. Right. What does that journey look like from your perspective, Carla?
33:25
Yeah. I would say that a lot of my clients report feeling lighter. Ah yes. As they walk through life. And I, I think that there's a lot of mental space and energy that's taken up by what ifs or shoulds or guilt or replaying scenarios. And once you have the chance to step away and process through those and lay them down and shift your energy around them, you are no longer walking around burdened in the same way. And you have so much more capacity and energy for the things that you want to do, the things that you enjoy, the things that are truly you. And as we mentioned values before, that helps us really hone in on what the most important things are that we can prioritize when we have that extra energy. But that is the untangible benefit, I think, that can't be described from doing this energy leadership work.
34:36
And I think too, being able to have a deeper connection with people, like there's relationship benefit. I, I'm very passionate about relationships. To me that is the oxygen of life. But being able to have more compassion for people who trigger you, being able to be more positive and have life-giving friends because you connect on those higher energy levels, those are other intangibles that can't really, you can, it's hard to articulate how beneficial and meaningful those things are. So those are two ways that I've seen some of my clients really relish the results of energy leadership in their relationships and just the way that they show up and feel in life in general. I'm sure you've probably experienced similar, Dana.
35:34
Yes. When you coached me, Carla, explaining here, you, you've mentioned twice, like it's hard to articulate and I'm like, you're actually doing a perfect job of it. Like,
35:44
Well thanks,
35:44
You know, how do we quantify feeling lighter? Like how do we, it's just, it's we, it's lighter something money can't buy. Right. Feeling lighter. You know, part of the Dana Buyer's coaching logo has this kind of little squiggle underneath it and it's really a knot that's being untangled. And when I, when I worked on that logo with the branding team, I was thinking about how when I met with you Carla, I literally brought kind of this, I thought you could look at me and see all the tangle knots in my mind. Of course you never judge me. But I was like, she can probably see, it's like I need to open up my head, dump out all these knots, and one by one we're just gonna untangle them. And that's what happens in coaching, particularly me, I'm very partial to coaches who follow Jesus because we get to look holistically at the knots in our head, our mental knots, our emotional knots, invite God into that scenario, see what his word says, see what he would show us uniquely about our scenarios.
36:42
And then, you know, in a place of vulnerability, be able to receive the validation we need, be able to listen to our thoughts and feelings, acknowledge those, and then move forward with confidence because of the self-awareness we have. And I think that's a beautiful thing about going through this kind of coaching because we also, you know, we, we aren't trying to learn about ourselves for the sake of puffing ourselves up. We're trying to understand how we work, what gets our gears going so that we can bring a better result to all the people, like you mentioned, relationships. They're such high value to us. The people we are in relationship, whether it's at work, family, friends, at church, my neighbors, whatever that looks like, we get to respond in a beautiful way because we've taken the time to understand ourselves. And then as you said, you know, when one person changes in a relationship, that relationship changes. Yes. So we get to be the person, we get to go first maybe, but we will see improvement in that over time. And it's such a rewarding experience. I think you really captured it well with your words, Carla,
37:48
Thank you.
37:49
Well, thank you so much for making time to share with us today. You are a treasure to me. I am thankful for your example. I'm following your lead and I just thank you for making time to share with my clients. Before we wrap up, Carla, where can anyone find you? Where's the best place to find you?
38:07
Sure. So I am on Facebook, Carla Miller Coaching. Also my website is carla miller coaching.com. I am in Indiana. So for all of those Indiana friends that follow along to Dana's podcast, maybe I've seen you somewhere. That is where people will find me. Thank you so much for having me, Dana. It's a, a blessing to watch you and cheer you on. You're amazing in this space and at what you do. I learned from you as much as you learn from me. So thank you, Carla. I appreciate it so much. You're welcome.
38:46
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